Words for the Dumpster – NYTimes.com

Words for the Dumpster – NYTimes.com.

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I’m Back! (Again.) This time with some Key & Peele.

Well, here I am again after a two year absence. This time, I am posting something that I and my circle of friends have been laughing at recently and that I haven’t found well done on the Internet — Key & Peele’s East/West Collegiate Bowl names and schools. Key & Peele are hilarious. If you haven’t been watching them, start immediately. Without further ado, here they are.

Annual East/West Collegiate Bowl

And now for the names and schools.


D’Marcus Williums / University of Gerogia
T.J. Juckson / Wayne State University
T’Variusness King / Merrimack College
Tyroil Smoochie-Wallace / University of Miami
D’Squarius Green, Jr. / University of Notre Dame
Ibrahim Moizoos / University of Tennessee at Chattanooga
Jackmerius Tacktheritrix / Michigan State University
D’Isiah T. Billings-Clyde / Coastal Carolina University
D’Jasper Probincrux III / South Carolina State University
Leoz Maxwell Jilliumz / East Carolina University
Javaris Jamar Javarison-Lamar / University of Middle Tennessee
Davoin Shower-Handel / University of Southern Mississippi
Hingle McCringleberry / Penn State University
L’Carpetron Dookmarriot / Florida Atlantic University
J’Dinkalage Morgoone / University of South Florida
Xmus Jaxon Flaxon-Waxon / California University of Pennsylvania


Saggitariutt Jefferspin / Texas A&M
D’Glester Hardunkichud / University of Wisconsin
Swirvithan L’Goodling-Splatt / Saskatchewan University
Quatro Quatro / San Jose State University
Ozamataz Buckshank / Stanford University
Beezer Twelve Washingbeard / Jones College
Shakiraquan T.G.I.F. Carter / University of Northern Arizona
X-Wing @Aliciousness / Missouri Western State University
Sequester Grundelplith M.D. / Adams State
Scoish Velociraptor Maloish / South Dakota State University
T.J. A.J. R.J. Backslashinfourth V / Albion College
Eeeee Eeeeeeeee / San Diego State University
Donkey Teeth / Boise State University
Torque (Construction Noise) Lewith / Nevada State Penitentiary
The Player Formerly Known as Mousecop / University of Missouri / Columbia
Dan Smith / BYU

Annual East/West Collegiate Bowl 2

And now for the names and schools.


Coznesster Smiff / Rutgers University
Elipses Corter / University of Alabama
Nyquillus Dillwad / LSU
Bismo Funyuns / Florida State University
Decatholac Mango / Georgia Tech University
Mergatroid Skittle / University of Louisville
Quiznatodd Bidness / University of Tennessee
D’Pez Poopsie / Ole Miss
Quackadilly Blip / Auburn University
Goolius Boozler / The U
Bisquiteen Trisket / University of Michigan
Fartrell Cluggins / University of Arkansas
Blyrone Blashinton / Syracuse
Cartoons Plural / Virginia Tech
Jammie Jammie-Jammie / The Ohio State University
Fudge / (No school given)


Equine Ducklings / Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis
Dahistorius Lamystorius / Utah State University
Ewokoniad Sigourneth Juniorstein / Oklahoma State University
Eqqsquizitine Buble-Schwinslow / University of Nebraska
Huka’lakanaka Hakanakaheekalucka’hukahakafaka / University of Hawaii
King Prince Chambermaid / Baylor University
Ladennifer Jadaniston / University of Colorado
Ladadadaladadadadada Dala-Dadaladaladalada / University of Arizona
Harvard University / DeVry University
Morse Code / Army Navy Surplus Store
Wingdings / Online Classes
Firstname Lastname / College University
God / Home schooled
Squeeeeeeeeeeps / Santa Monica College
Benedict Cumberbatch / Oxford University
A.A. Ron Balakay / Morehouse College

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Those Things for Which I am Thankful on this Thanksgiving 2011

Turkey 01It has been a rough year for me for reasons that I don’t want to go into quite yet. With that said, I am feeling pretty good today and I have many things for which to be thankful on the great American holiday.

  • My wonderfully supportive, loving, smart, and beautiful wife.
  • That we are both healthy.
  • That we have good, stable jobs in a terrible economy.
  • That, after decades of driving boring, sensible cars, I now have a MINI Cooper S Hardtop that is beyond a joy to drive (and it gets very good gas mileage).
  • That I live in a part of the world without earthquakes, tropical storms, or tornadoes (at least very infrequent tornadoes).

Today, we are making two turkey breasts, mashed taters, sweet taters with butter and brown sugar, broccoli and cauliflower with cheese sauce, whole grain rolls, and cranberries. Yum.

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I am back (for now).

I was hoping to regularly update this blog, but I clearly have not been successful. I am going to try again, though I given my history, future performance is questionable.

Before heading out to write a post about what I am thankful for this Thanksgiving, I thought I would put up a couple of pics of my new baby (acquired on November 5).





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Trip to Europe

Europe1-15Last Saturday, I returned from my first real vacation in 7 years. It was 2-1/2 weeks in Northern Italy, the Jungfrau region of Switzerland, and Northeastern France. It also included a quick trip to Paris. Given how hard I have been working the past few years, it took a little time to get into “vacation mode”, but I must say that once I did, it was amazing.

The trip started by flying to Zurich and then taking a train to Milan. Our good friend, Francesco, who happened to be there for a meeting, met us at the train station and the touring began. Milan isn’t as touristy as Florence, Venice, or Rome, but it is a beautiful city with some amazing old churches. Some pics can be found here.

From Milan, we took a train to Verbania, Italy, which sits on the shores of Lake Maggiore. Touring the Isola Madre and Isola Bella was a treat and the botanical gardens were a treat for my plant-loving wife, Suzanne. Should you be in the area, I highly recommend the hotel we stayed in, Grand Hotel Majestic. The location is amazing, the food good, it was clean, and the service was top-notch. Some pics can be found here.

After leaving Lake Maggiore, we took a train to Interlaken, Switzerland, which is in the Jungfrau region of Switzerland. It was one of the most beautiful and wonderful places I have ever been—the mountains and lakes are stunning and the hiking is outstanding. We happened to stay at a hotel run by an Italian gentleman and his Swiss wife. He was also the chef and he was incredible. He made a seafood pasta that was a religious experience. Some pics can be found here.

After Interlaken, it was back on a train, but this time to Strasbourg. God, what a magnificently livable and beautiful city. We had a few days of vacation time (including a quick trip on the TGV to Paris) and then our stay ended with Suzanne attending the European MRS meeting. The local tarte flambée was a treat and the Strasbourg Cathedral was amazing. Some pics can be found here.

Though probably a result of the grass always being greener, I must say that Europe seems like a very pleasant place to live. I am back at work now and the ASEE meeting is next week. I will be so glad when that is over since it has taken much of my physical and emotional energy lately.

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The iPad: An Extremely Useful Device for Profs

I got my iPad about three weeks ago and this thing has changed how I use both my MacBook Pro and my iPhone. First, I am using my iPhone a lot less than I did PiP (Pre-iPad). I don’t play games much, but when I do, I am playing them on the iPad. I used to use my iPhone a lot for stuff like Twitter, reading news, and keeping up with RSS feeds — not any more — it’s all done on the iPad. When I need to quickly look something up, I used to head for the iPhone — again, not any more. I rarely check email on my iPhone any more and I am taking care of a huge amount of the email I get on the iPad.

I am also finding that the iPad is the perfect device for taking notes at meetings and for making lists. With Simplenote and its ability to use the cloud to sync between my Mac, iPad, and iPhone, I also have my lists and notes with me and I can always edit them, no matter which device is at hand.

As a device for, as they say, consuming content, it has no peer. Reading books, surfing the web, watching video (on Netflix, ABC, and via downloaded content from iTunes), and reading magazines is immersive. It’s hard to describe how cool it is not to have that keyboard between you and the content.

The bottom line: this thing really is a new paradigm in computing.

Footnote: Some Essential Apps

In no particular order:

Let me know in the comments if you have any favorite apps I have overlooked.

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ASEE Mechanics Division

I am the Chair of the Mechanics Division of ASEE this year and as such, I have numerous duties that need to be completed before the annual meeting in June. Various personal and professional obligations and problems have prevented me from taking care of these duties and now the shit it hitting the fan. I need to get back to it or I will be universally hated by everyone in the division.

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